An inquisitive old fart with a camera
Syd sent me photos he took recently of signs in the Caribbean. Nothing to do with Uruguay, but too good not to pass on.
Nailed to a tree in front of a rather simple house in Bequia, Grenadines. Don’t trouble with trying to parse it.
All’s ill that ends L?
That awkward moment when you realize your drink’s been drinking. In the morning, no less.
A new sign has appeared in the Tienda Inglesa parking lot in Atlántida.
In a northern setting, it wouldn’t merit a second glance (except for being in Spanish: ”Thanks for leaving your shopping cart here.”)
However, as I joked to the employee in the parking lot, you can tell the new owners are American.
Klaff Realty, LP, owners of the Safeway and Albertson’s supermarket chains in north America, bought Tienda Inglesa’s 10 stores in March for $120 million. The shift has been subtle but palpable: aisles opening up, less innacessible merchandise cluttering the tops of shelf units.
And now this — thanking customers for not simply abandoning their shopping cart anywhere in the crowded parking lot (often requiring the next person to move it before being able to park).. Wow! Efficiency! Innovation! Think of what could happen next.
Maybe they’ll instruct employees not to block entire aisles with shopping carts as they stock shelves during the busiest periods? Nah, unlikely.
Or teach cashiers that their little bar, referred to up north as a “separator” or “divider,” and sometimes saying “Next Customer,” has a function other than breaking the photo-electric beam that makes the conveyor belt move? Seriously, as we started to unload our shopping cart onto the Tienda Inglesa conveyor belt today, my wife reached for the divider to separate our groceries from the previous customer’s. The grumpy cashier actually grabbed it and put it back, insisting that its function was to turn the conveyor belt on and off.
Perhaps I should take a felt marker and start writing on them ”Próximo Cliente,” No, they’d probably consider that vandalism.
I do, however, find some inspiration in the gringo who got so tired of Montevideo restaurants listing unavailable menu items that he started carrying a Sharpie marker, and crossing them off the menu with indelible ink as they were announced nonexistent by the waiter. So wrong it’s just right!
Between Paracas and Naxca, Perú. Perhaps because the image shows the exact opposite of what they want you to do, the message doubles down: “Don’t urinate or piss outside the bowl.” Further adding to its charm, it’s posted above urinals, not toilets.
The irony, of course, is that the possessive apostrophe is not used in Spanish. Except in business names in Uruguay, apparently. But two, and backwards? Reminds me of 9s.
Yes, the accents on Olé Olé are backward.
A friend mentioned this sign today, which I only saw for the first time last week. He assures me it’s been here at least four years.
The faceless girl’s bikini — at least the bottom — is very modest by Uruguay beach standards, and the faceless boy … well, how exactly does he balance on one foot like that?
When I asked the clerk about this, he said the oferta referred to the bulbs in the black boxes.
Then he saw the humor in it, smiled.
Did he change anything? Probably not.
About a month ago, I noticed someone had dumped some construction rubbish in the road near us. Then I saw a backhoe moving it onto the lot, which had clearly been very wet during the recent rains.
And a sign: Se recibe escombro. (Clean) fill wanted. Escombro refers to bits of what houses and such are made of: brick, concrete, tile.
From that, now this ungainly mess, including plastic. And a new sign: Propriedad privada – no tirar basura ni escombro. Private property. Do not dump garbage or construction waste.
More ironic, the rather brutal potholes in the road. In five minutes, someone with a shovel and wheelbarrow could fill them, with the material right there. No one has. I would (did once before) but my wheelbarrow is in the country. One of these days….